out going mail

I occasionally, make that regularly, write letters to folks in my head. Mainly just to humor myself, because let's face it, no one else would think they are funny. I've had a lot of letters filed in my mental outgoing mail tray for a few days now, so I figured I'd send a few of them via the blog.

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Dear NBC Studios,

Thank you for not allowing me to get anything done the last two weeks. I am enthralled by curling, skiing, bobsledding, ice hockey (when the US is playing), speed skating, and snowboarding. While I have no idea what is happening in curling, and the announcers don't seem to see a need for sharing with the audience the rules and/or goal, I cannot change the channel and almost always stay up past my bed time.

My problem with your network is that you seem to air all of the interesting sports at 11:30 at night on CNBC and MSNBC. I'm sorry, but the US men's hockey team beating Canada for the first time in 50 years is ten thousand time more news worthy and exciting that Sally Jo from the United States jumping up off the ice, twirling two times in the air, and landing again (and not even really sticking the landing).

And one more thing, if you're going to show the exciting stuff on MSNBC and CNBC, at the very least, you could start coverage at the beginning of the event (or end for curling) so that we get to see it start instead of waiting for the the commericial to end.  Coming in 4 rocks into an end is not acceptable.

I sincerely hope you consider changing the more interesting and athletic sports to your main network and may possibly have the curling commentators explain the game of curling (but as I said, this isn't a make or break issue, I'm going to be enamored anyway).

Sincerely,
Rachel E.

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Dear International Olympic Commission,

Since you have chosen to allow figure skating and ice dancing as Olympic "sports" I thought I would provide you with a few more ideas which are sure to please the masses.

Dog Sledding
Since we are show casing our athletes, why not let their best friends compete as well. I think it'd be pretty nifty to watch these guys go on a weeklong race. It would also be like a reality tv show as you chronicled their evenings at their make shift camps.

King of the Hill
While I'm not sure how exactly this would be organized, I'm sure you could figure that out. I'm thinking one or two individuals from each nation compete to make it to the top of the snow pile. This has to be more athletic than your skating competitions.

Snowball Dodge Ball
My husband, C, said he'd watch this sport.  Athletes must make their own snow balls and then take out the opposition.

Snow Shoveling
How quickly can you shovel your snow? Fastest country wins gold. Whether or not snow blowers are allowed is up to you.

I hope these ideas help when you consider what games to add next. I think you'll find these games are more athletic than ice dancing and figure skating.

-Rachel E.

P.S. You may want to have a chat with Canada re: their organization of the events. Seems like they flubbed a lot of things this year, starting with having two torches, one of which took 15 minutes to appear. And while you're at it you may want to warn London that other countries tend to make fun of those countries who have known they will be hosting the events for years, but still manage to make it look like the local high schoolers where put in charge of organizing everything as part of their senior projects.